Healing Through New Communication Patterns

Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) is a key approach we use to support couples and families in deepening their emotional connection and improving communication. We guide couples to uncover the underlying emotional needs that drive their reactive behaviors and patterns. Often, partners get stuck in cycles where one person—typically the pursuer—becomes anxious, seeking more connection and closeness, while the other person—the withdrawer—retreats or distances themselves out of a fear of being overwhelmed or criticized. This creates a negative feedback loop where the pursuer’s attempts to engage are met with resistance, and the withdrawer’s attempts to protect themselves are misinterpreted as disinterest or rejection. Both partners become trapped in a cycle of miscommunication and unmet emotional needs, which only deepens their disconnection.

Through EFT, we help couples recognize these patterns and understand their underlying emotional triggers. We teach both partners how to express their emotions more vulnerably and how to respond to one another with empathy and attunement. By learning to share their deepest emotional needs in a non-reactive way, pursuers can feel heard without escalating, and withdrawers can feel safe enough to engage without feeling criticized. As a result, couples can break free from these negative cycles, build trust, and develop healthier ways of communicating, leading to deeper intimacy, understanding, and connection.